Sometimes

I now see the ways of my nature.. I have changed. I no longer chase things, nor try for things that obviously want fuck all to do with me. That would have bugged me yrs ago.. now its meh.. to each their own.
The reason I am reminded not to date is because I am nice, in general ways, and old school. This output can paint a picture of some deep interest. When to me, its just being chivalrous and proper. For attraction can be a given sometimes. But if something is given so easily and readily to me.. then why would I have interest in it.. for it is usually given to anyone else as well.. yes I mean dating and sex. I don't want a deep connection when dating.. and if they put sex on the table early, then there is not going to be a second date. I'm more reserved than that. I know I can bring something different to the table. And I won't just give that to anyone because I'm horny.. It is a personal thing for me.. and no judgements for those who see otherwise. But this is who and how I am. Myself, regardless of the norm. Maybe this is what dates my age, or my soul. That's ok.. I have no problem with consensual sex tbh. But I do need to know the person.. Have at the very least an intellectual attraction.
Its been so so long since I've had knock down drag out marathon sex. The debauchery of the flesh. In very personal and kinky ways. And it does bug me I admit.
I know on some level, I can be a game changer. Heart, respect, old school romance. And also the depth of sexuality that has almost no limits.. but for me, this will never be something of myself I can just share with anyone. I do like being the darkest chapter in a womans sexual diary..and I haven't been for a very very very long time. Maybe because nobody can simply tap into that side of me? Anyways.. here is to just being ourselves, no judgements from others..but being true to who we are inside